Last week, I did an episode on trust and believing what your significant other revealed about their sexual history. Inevitably, this spawned the discussion about sex partners ( and sadly, some guys had very sexist thoughts/expectations of women). One male even commented that he wanted to know how many people she’s been with so that he can protect her. Now, I’ve never heard of this reasoning before..so I’m surveying you to get your thoughts on this topic.
First off. we all know how important it is to honestly talk about sexual history with your mate – about sexual practices, STIs, safer sex, birth control, etc. So this talk is standard and it’s essential. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way…
Game Dae Wednesdae is: Does it matter to you about your partner’s past sex rendevous? Whether it be the number of partners, what they’ve experience, how long ago? If so, why? Also, what is your age? and I’m not referring to as a curiosity. When I say matter, I mean, it really matters to you.
I have a theory about this and will see if it’s true according to our v’stars.
Remember this applies to your best friend situation if they are single. If your BFF is dating someone, then don’t chance it by having the conversation. Could get awkward.
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Your patience did not go unrewarded. Here is the brand spanking first Vanae.com episode since I’ve been back! Part of Game Dae Wednesdae:
What are other scenerios you wish people would be UPFRANK? Comment below!
Much requested topic, I just finished the Vanae.com show episode on ‘dating more than one person’.
I think there’s nothing wrong with dating multiple people as long you are not exclusive and very honest with the people involved. If you want to be exclusive, then bring it up and have a conversation about it with your partner.
I’m going into the second week in Costa Rica and it’s been lovely. Great weather! Food! Good people! and dancing!
Q: HI. When u have your first time experimenting with sex, does it really hurt ??? and what are the consequences because my boyfriend asked me if i was ready but i am not sure what to tell him so can u help me please.
A: Hey girl, thanks for reaching out and opening up. I think your question and curiosity is a smart one. Shows that you’re asking and thinking through before just doing it. The first time having sex is a special moment that everyone always remembers. My first time:
A light lit room, with my high school boyfriend facing me and kissing me with reassurance. It was very memorable because tt was a mixture of excitement, scary, pain, pleasure, closeness, nervousness. Most importantly, we both truly cared for each other, we were both ready and we talked about it beforehand.
With the first partner, females tend to get emotionally attached and ‘fall in love’ with the person they lose their virginity to. Make sure you ask yourself if this is person you want to share this specialness with. Yes, sex for the first time can hurt and you need to make sure that you’re truly ready and comfortable. If you have any doubts that you’re ready, then that’s a sign that you’re probably not ready. Before you have sex:
1. Please yourself, not your bf
The decision to have sex should never be to please your bf. Your decision should be based on if YOU’RE ready and if this is what YOU want. It’s all about you! Be honest with your bf on how you feel about it. If he cares for you, he should understand and there should be open communication.
2. Consequences
Please think about pregnancy, STIs, and emotional attachment as these are the consequences of having sex. Talk to your partner getting tested (if he’s not a virgin) and these consquences because these can change your life. To avoid pregnancy and STIs (sexually transmitted infections), use condoms. You can look online for information on how to use condoms correctly.
3. More questions?
Talk to friends and parents, if possible, to get better perspective on readiness. If you have further questions about consequences or sex-related, contact your local Planned Parenthood clinic or your family physician.
Vanae’s tip of the dae: Be ready when you are. When you make decisions because you’re truly ready, makes the experience richer.
