I definitely appreciate it when girls are upfront about how they feel about me. In my experience there are girls who like to flirt and lead you on, so knowing that they really like you because they told you cuts out a lot of guesswork and misunderstanding.

I wrote this blob on myspace about a year ago. I think it fits fairly well to this.

As I begin to look around again,
I see the people around me,
But I am still alone.
Perplexed by this phenomenon,
I evaluate what it means to be “alone”.
Once again I am alone,
With the one I love so close,
But completely unreachable.
Not physically,
But in every other aspect.
Although I have learned to forget what hurts,
Everything that hurts has not forgotten me.
Dont get me wrong,
I dont mind being hurt.
Everyone gets hurt once in a while,
But the thing is,
You learn to work around it.
Forgive and embrace.
No one wants to be alone,
Forever anyway..
When your alone,
You leave words unspoken.
The best thing to do is speak those words.
Put your heart out there,
So others can embrace it.
If you love someone,
Tell them.
Dont wait until your surrounded by everyone,
And the one person that means the most,
Has no idea you care for them.

..maybe they feel the exact same way.

It is much nicer when a woman tells you right upfront how she feels. Sure, the flirting and guesswork is fun for some time. However, if you don’t make a move thinking that she’s only messing with you then you’re out of a date. If you make a move and she isn’t really interested then you’re more than likely in for an embarassing situation.

Unfortunately, most people can tell when others are into each other, but they can’t tell when it is happening to them. It is a curse, not a gift, for when someone is interested and you don’t know then you miss out on so much (even if it does only end up being a friendship at most).

So, Vanae, I have a question. How do you grab a girl’s attention without coming off as pompous/a jerk/ something she would immediately reject. Being myself doesn’t get me anywhere because I’m shy and admire from afar. And anyone can answer this because, yes, I am desperate for an answer.

Yo R:

First of all, who cares what your friends think, opinions are like a$$holes everybody has one and
it usually stinks. If YOU really know this guy and YOU like him, go for it, like Vanae said your REAL friends will come around, if not find some new ones.
Another thing. When listining to friends about all this stuff about relationships, ask yourself. Do
the friends giving me this advice have a man, AND
if they do is it a GOOD relationship? If the answer is no to either of these. Tell them to talk to the hand, cause the ear’s not listening. how in the world is somebody going to tell you how to handle something they can’t handle themselves. Asking them for advice is like asking someone to teach you how to drive who either doesnt know the difference between a gas and a brake pedal, or has a license but keeps getting onto accidents.

hey, “R”
i asked vanea a question about a year ago, becasue i really liked this girl, and i still do,
some part of me tells me it might be a little more, because its been roughly the same amount of time.
i asked what i should do to build bridges between the gaps we had, she kind of knew, but again i wasnt so sure if she did.she was very popular and her freinds didnt exactly agree with me , so i was hesitant.
i only wish that she might feel even remotely how you do for this guy, ive felt the same for years but i never said anything becasue i worried howshe might react, so i did nothing,
please, if you like him, and you think he likes you,be subtle, and let things take time, talk your freinds around slowly, dont tease, but make more conversation, and drop some signs,you shouldnt regret it.x

upfront is best IMO. the games can be childish and confusing. I agree with the subtle flirting and honesty.

it would be great if girls flirt with us , I want to rest for a while

from my opinion..i suggests you should give atry as he did impress you so much. and the best part is you guys hv already known each other so well. this could be better in case he reject you. tell you what, i think guys would be more kind in term of rejecting compared to girls. and guys are willing to be friend with you even though the failure happens. so 50 50 chance.either you bet lose nothing and remain as friend or win your dreams. gambateh!

Guys need as much help as possible. He probably does like you, but is afraid of damaging your friendship. Turn up the heat on the flirtation, see what happens.

Hey, about that question if guys like it when a female lets them know she’s interested? The answer is HELLZ YES! Heck it’s the 21st century! Why not? Women have been going for everything else they’ve wanted for the past 50 years or so, careers, equal rights, equal salaries, etc. But when it comes to dating they are still stuck in the dark ages; still afraid of being labeled as too forward, a slut, or a tease. For those who are concerned about this, I may be able to help, or not. But, buyer be warned, I’m going to keep it raw and real, Sooooo, if you’re easily offended, at least 50 pounds overweight, balding, have a unibrow, genital warts, facial and chest hair, ugly as the crypt keeper, in desperate need of some serious dental work, or a delusional, defensive, drama queen, that always has something to say, after someone that actually has something to say, says something? Please, save yourself the devastation and stop reading because this will not help you, believe me; you have waaaaaaaay deeper issues you need to deal with. Okay, from a guy’s perspective, being friendly and approaching a guy for romantic reasons, doesn’t make you a too forward or slut, SLEEPING with a lot of guys does. You approaching him can actually be very helpful. If he’s a little shy and you’re considered to be very attractive, he may be intimidated, or figure you’re already taken. And being sexy in it doesn’t necessarily make you a tease, however, making out with a guy half naked in the back of his SUV or your bedroom when you’re and not ready to put out, for us does. When we leave with a case of blue balls because we don’t want to catch a case, who gives a s#!t! We‘ll honor the fact that no means no, but you wont be called again. Other than that GO FOR IT! Just remember, right or wrong, there are STILL the double standards out there. If you’re going enter into what is unfortunately still considered the guy’s realm. Please do us all a favor, especially if you’ve been dating a while and you’re looking for “real love”. You probably already know how most guys are; be accountable for your emotions if things don’t go as planned. The last thing any of us need is another F’ing, bitter a$$ed, beeyoch out there cockblocking her friend who may get some action. All things being “EQUAL”, Do what every guy has been doing from the of time we stopped clubbing women over the head and dragging them into caves till today, “MAN UP” and move on!

My gawd how I wish the women I liked/think liked me wud be more upfront and stop playing mind-games. TBH there is only so much certain guys like me can put up with.