Clip from the Greek Theatre show, Michael Franti performing “I’ll be waiting for you”- with lyrics “The best things in life aren’t things/They’re living, they’re breathing.” It’s a song about being there for other people, ready to catch them when they fall.
Now, I wasn’t a Michael Franti fan…not until last night when I witnessed him in action at the Greek Theatre in Berkeley. I’ve never seen so many middle aged people boggeying on down! We were an eclectic audience mixed with former hippies, little children, older gentleman and young people and we were all dancing the night away. The way he interacted with the audience, it was clear that there was no distinction between the performers and the audience…we were whole, uniting through music and soul.
His music and lyrics were uplifting and moving. He encouraged us to hug our friends next to us and show appreciation. That’s exactly what I did…appreciating this great evening with good friends. I felt the impact Michael had on people with his music- community, unity, love, meaning…
I was thinking about impact and people…then it hit me…
I don’t have the most subscribers on YouTube…
My video views aren’t nearly as much as the video of a barfing kitty…
Nor do I have millions of hits on my blog…
but none of that truly matters.
For the 25,000 v’stars out there and counting (leading with soul and self empowerment)…I’m proud of each of you! You’re making the world a better place, by creating meaning for yourself, evolving and making a positive impact on others. What we’re putting in place…is exponential goodness and for that, makes me feel fuzzy and proud.
I guess what I’m saying is…QUALITY OVER QUANTITY!
In the same way Michael Franti’s music and spirit touched me, I hope you are inspired by his lyrics to live with meaning with everything you have- your life.
This week, I am in LA for the YouTube Partner Conference & VidCon 2010- so expect fun interviews with YouTubers about dating topics!
In the meanwhile, below is a post that I wrote and intended to post this past January, as a reflection of the whole year 2009 and what I’ve learned.
————-
It was such an incredible year for me with lot of BIG changes and life-altering experiences, so I thought I’d share them with you. Lessons and gifts that 2009 offered me:
1. It’s easier to run away from things (thinking that you’re escaping), but running blindly gets you no where and often times you realize, you’ve just been running in circles.
2. Complacency: We can be complacent in:
o Relationships
o In how we act in social settings (wallpaper, sticking to our own circle)
o Expectations of ourselves, to avoid failure
3. Intense or strong reactions or walls, stems from EGO.
4. Lost IS an opportunity in disguise. This is when evaluation really kicks in. Is this what I really want to do? What is my purpose? Am I living the best life? Doing my most potential? Am I happy? When a door closes, another door opens. Recession, job change, lost of job, has made so many young people evaluate how they are spending their time, if they are really doing what they want: because you can lose your job in a heartbeat. Do what you love so you don’t feel like you’re just floating by.
5. My biggest fear: Being oblivious to how things really are or how people feel. Who’s reality really matters?
6. Most importantly, I’m appreciative of how fortunate I am. From the great opportunities that come my way to the fantastic people I have in my life- I must be the luckiest person on Earth.
Being able to focus on a path of coaching & self-awareness- what I’m deeply passionate about. I have a mum who’s supportive of me, by expecting my unexpected decisions (doesn’t mean she stopped worrying about me). Luckily, I get spend most my time helping people and helping with transformations. And lastly, I feel extremely lucky to have good quality friends, especially my classmates who have been unconditionally supportive and loving.
In 2009 was such a year of invigorating experiences:
o Fantastic friends that went on a memorable RV roadtrip to Disneyland for my 28th birthday
o Spending time with my Boston family in May. My aunt made fried chicken and I love me some fried chicken!
o I met Robin Thicke- a gentle and charismatic person
o Incredible 4th of July, celebrating one of my closest friend’s bday filled with baby farm animals, funnel cake, the best fireworks show and Sunday neighborhood family parade.
o Living and working remotely for a month in the mountains of Costa Rica- rain forest, volcano, horseback riding, getting to know my friendly Rican neighbors
o Roadtripping around the country & discovering the South giving out Free Hugs near Christmas time: Nashville, New Orleans, Austin, Grand Canyon, great new friends
o Life-changing spiritual coaching program with the most incredible and supportive fellow classmates, deep personal development
And of course, what would I do without my v’stars?! I’m very thankful for you and the joy you bring to me, yourself and the world. What lessons are you grateful for?
“If today is the day you will take your destiny into your hands, you will soon discover that you hold the keys of fate.”- Unknown
If there is anything my friends and family know me as, it’s: I seize opportunities and make shit happen! I’ve been the biggest advocate of finding your own voice, carving your own path that’s authentic to you, making your own destiny, and become the biggest learner of life.
As young people survive the recession, we realized that any job or materialistic satisfaction can diminish at any moment. This brought on a turn of realization for our generation: If we can lose our job at any moment, then why not do what we truly want to do? Live life to how we want to?
So many young people are questioning how they were spending their time (work, family, etc) and explore where their passion really lies. Especially, in the last 2 years, individuals were looking for new jobs in industry they always wanted to do. Moving to new cities, states and countries to revitalize their life. Some going to school to advance in the direction they’ve always dreamed of. Others, quit to travel and live life. Mostly, re-evaluating a meaningful life, change and reducing the materialistic indulgence that really doesn’t matter in the long run. I know I did! It was refreshing.
This blog post was inspired by DailyOm blog post below (exploring passion and breaking down time constraints):
How we utilize that time is consequently one of the most important decisions we make. Yet it is far too easy to put off until tomorrow what we are dreaming of today. The hectic pace of modern existence affords us an easy out; we shelve our aspirations so we can cope more effectively with the challenges of the present, ostensibly to have more time and leisure to realize our purpose in the future. Or we tell ourselves that we will chase our dreams someday once we have accomplished other lesser goals. In truth, it is our fear that keeps us from seeking fulfillment in the here and now—because we view failure as a possibility, our reasons for delaying our inevitable success seem sound and rational. If we ask ourselves what we are really waiting for, however, we discover that there is no truly compelling reason why we should put off the pursuit of the dreams that sustain us.
When regarded as a question, “Why not now?” drains us of our power to realize our ambitions. We are so concerned with the notion that we are somehow undeserving of happiness that we cannot see that there is much we can do in the present to begin courting it. Yet when we look decisively at our existence and state, “Why not now, indeed!” we are empowered to begin changing our lives this very moment. We procrastinate for many reasons, from a perceived lack of time to a legitimate lack of self-belief, but the truth of the matter is that there is no time like the present and no time but the present. Whatever we aim to accomplish, we will achieve it more quickly and with a greater degree of efficiency when we seize the day and make the most of the resources we have at our disposal presently.
All the joy, passion, and contentment you can envision can be yours right now, rather than in some far-flung point in time. You need only remind yourself that there is nothing standing between you and fulfillment. If you decide that today is the day you will take your destiny into your hands, you will soon discover that you hold the keys of fate.
What will you do in your life NOW that you know you can?
My most favorite part of coaching is the in-person interaction: whether it’s doing workshops, guest speaking or just having a discussion with young people. I’ve been on speaking panels and a guest speaker at different colleges and I absolutely love it! There’s something very powerful in the interactions. To really make a connection and have a peer-to-peer chat that’s more effective than a boring lecture, which you may feel like you’re being talked at, instead of with. The feeling that you’re truly making a connection and hopefully, they left feeling inspired to think about their health, their goals or for more self-awareness.
I recently did a talk at Virginia Tech on the topic of Interracial Dating and doing a live QnA session with the students. It was so much fun! We talked about societal/cultural/family pressure for us to date within our race and how to approach this communication. I’ve always loved talking with young people. Their energy. Their curiosity. Their intelligence and just the fun discussion to provoke more curiosity and understanding.
In a way, Im fulfilling one of my dreams.
I remember being a freshman in college, sitting in class and looking up front to the guest speaker who was presenting. She was older. She was talking about sexual health. She seemed as though she was reading through a list of notes. There was no connection. The information didn’t soak in. I couldn’t even tell you what I learned from that talk. and I remember thinking…
I want to educate, by connecting with young people. One day, I’m going to stand in front of classes and groups of young people and have a discussion with them. In order to really get through to students, the connection has to be genuine. Powerful in the personal experience. Verbage and language has to be aligned. The main thing, the student and speaker has to relate. I’m going to do that in a fun, peer-to-peer way and make a difference.
and today, I’m blessed to say…I’m doing exactly that. Doing workshops and speaking with young people about sexual health (for my non-profit Rock Your Awareness), dating, communication, relationships (through my life & dating coaching), impacts on multi-cultural communities and growing up as Asian American.
So thank you to Tom Medina and Virginia Tech for the wonderful opportunity!
New mantra: I choose to live by choice and not by chance; to make changes, not excuses; to be motivated, not manipulated; to be useful, and not used; to excel, not compete.
I spotted this on a pornstar’s twitter bio. No Joke. and I like it!
V’stars, what is your mantra?
Mr. Seth wrote a blog post today, YOU ROCK, about putting pressure on yourself to do big things, when it only takes a lil bit to make a difference. Now, I totally get that he’s trying to motivate people. That…just 5 minutes of action can be significant. I’m a fan of the guy…he’s cute (in an inspiring- the world- kinda way). By the way, I’m well aware that men don’t like being described as ‘cute’ but I’ll give that to him anyway. I loved the overall message of his blog post.
But something about this part just didn’t sit right with me when he wrote, “You rock. This is deceptive. You don’t rock all the time. No one does. No one is a rock star, superstar, world-changing artist all the time. In fact, it’s a self-defeating goal. You can’t do it.”
Saying that is like saying “You’re wonderful. This is deceptive. You’re not wonderful all the time. No one is…”
Saying that would dismiss you as a whole.
Here’s what I think. YOU’RE WONDERFUL or YOU ROCK. You own it. It’s not exactly about what you do. It’s about you as a being. It’s you as a whole.
You feel me? Got all ghetto with you for a second there. I TRULY BELIEVE each and everyone of you…ROCK! It’s in you. That potential is brewing, if not expressed already. It’s not about what you do. It’s about who you are and the attitude & contributions that comes from there (inside you) when you fully embrace your awesomeness.
So, my question to you is….When you realize that YOU ROCK, this inspires you to _______________? V’stars, I want you to fill in the blank.
Vanae’s Tip of the Dae (inspired by Seth Gobin): Take a deep breath and take the time for your inner goodness to express kindness and share something. (well, not referring to swapping spit)
I wanna share the rest of Seth’s blog post, that I really dig… “Five minutes to write a blog post that changes everything, or five minutes to deliver an act of generosity that changes someone. Five minutes to invent a great new feature, or five minutes to teach a groundbreaking skill in a way that no one ever thought of before. Five minutes to tell the truth (or hear the truth).
Five minutes a day you might do exceptional work, remarkable work, work that matters. Five minutes a day you might defeat the lizard brain long enough to stand up and make a difference.”
Ever thought ‘I would love to share my article on Vanae.com?’ Well now you can! I have been getting articles and questions from those who want to post a guest blog article here. So I’m currently accepting submissions from guest bloggers!
Here are the guidelines:
- Must tie in the theme of dating, relationships, sex, spirituality or personal development
- No more than 500 words
- Be sure to include a short description about you, your blog and a url link.
Submit to: ayvanae@gmail.com
I will review each submission and will contact you if I decide yours will make it on here. Who knows, if your shietz good I might invite you to become a regular guest blogger here on Vanae.com
