New mantra: I choose to live by choice and not by chance; to make changes, not excuses; to be motivated, not manipulated; to be useful, and not used; to excel, not compete.
I spotted this on a pornstar’s twitter bio. No Joke. and I like it!
V’stars, what is your mantra?
Mr. Seth wrote a blog post today, YOU ROCK, about putting pressure on yourself to do big things, when it only takes a lil bit to make a difference. Now, I totally get that he’s trying to motivate people. That…just 5 minutes of action can be significant. I’m a fan of the guy…he’s cute (in an inspiring- the world- kinda way). By the way, I’m well aware that men don’t like being described as ‘cute’ but I’ll give that to him anyway. I loved the overall message of his blog post.
But something about this part just didn’t sit right with me when he wrote, “You rock. This is deceptive. You don’t rock all the time. No one does. No one is a rock star, superstar, world-changing artist all the time. In fact, it’s a self-defeating goal. You can’t do it.”
Saying that is like saying “You’re wonderful. This is deceptive. You’re not wonderful all the time. No one is…”
Saying that would dismiss you as a whole.
Here’s what I think. YOU’RE WONDERFUL or YOU ROCK. You own it. It’s not exactly about what you do. It’s about you as a being. It’s you as a whole.
You feel me? Got all ghetto with you for a second there. I TRULY BELIEVE each and everyone of you…ROCK! It’s in you. That potential is brewing, if not expressed already. It’s not about what you do. It’s about who you are and the attitude & contributions that comes from there (inside you) when you fully embrace your awesomeness.
So, my question to you is….When you realize that YOU ROCK, this inspires you to _______________? V’stars, I want you to fill in the blank.
Vanae’s Tip of the Dae (inspired by Seth Gobin): Take a deep breath and take the time for your inner goodness to express kindness and share something. (well, not referring to swapping spit)
I wanna share the rest of Seth’s blog post, that I really dig… “Five minutes to write a blog post that changes everything, or five minutes to deliver an act of generosity that changes someone. Five minutes to invent a great new feature, or five minutes to teach a groundbreaking skill in a way that no one ever thought of before. Five minutes to tell the truth (or hear the truth).
Five minutes a day you might do exceptional work, remarkable work, work that matters. Five minutes a day you might defeat the lizard brain long enough to stand up and make a difference.”
Recently, I was talking to a friend who’s in a relationship, which he knew it wasn’t going to last long-term. She’s a good person, but she wasn’t the right one for him. Sad part is…she has no idea.
People are in denial about their feelings. The line gets blurred between being dishonest of where the relationship is going versus just being complacent to see where it flows. If anytime you’re in a relationship and it dawns on you that it won’t work out long term, you need to be honest with your partner. Last thing you want to do is lead your partner on, causing more pain (than you were hoping to avoid).
Now, if your partner knows the certainty or uncertainty of a long term relationship, then at least they can make that decision to stay or accept that it’s a short-term thing. Otherwise, it’s leaving your partner in the dark and keeping that person in your life in selfishness.
It’s one thing, when both people have decided to enjoy and live out the fun relationship even if it’s short term. It’s another thing, when one person knows it’s going to end soon, yet leads the other person on.
Think about this: What if the roles were reversed? Would you want the other person to let you know if s/he knew it wasn’t going to work out long term?
Vanae’s tip of the dae: Be true to your partner, but more importantly…true to yourself. Be with someone you really care for, not just for the sake of being with someone. I’d rather be happily alone than lead someone on.
V’stars, have you been on either sides of this situation? How did it turn out?
I recognize that there are v’stars who want to attend my workshops but live across the world. So I wanted to create a fun, affordable and interactive way which you join me no matter where you live: a LIVE VIDEO WORKSHOP with me!
Friday, February 5th @ 6pm (Pacific Time), I will be having my first live video workshop, where I’ll be covering a big topic and v’stars can chat with me LIVE. You don’t need a webcam! and guess what? You get to decide what the topic of the first live video workshop will be!
Please cast your vote below. You have until 1/24 to vote and I will be sending out details on how you can register for this exclusive opportunity!!
Sometimes time apart is the healthiest top test to realize if
you were meant to be together.
Every time a wounded heart needs to heal, it takes time filled with
good friends, hobbies and lots of self awareness in between.
Moving on from a job, past relationship or stage in life,
we develop and evolve into richer human beings.
Sometimes we wonder if we made the right decision and only TIME is the best truth for that.
V’stars, has time been the best truth for you? Share your story.
Embracing yourself and letting others embrace you.
Currently, I am in a spiritual coaching program with 21 other loving individuals and while I was away at our first 4-day intense session, I gained something (actually, I gained alot). But one of things that I gained was Embracing.
Never have I ever felt so much love, compassion, and pure acceptance from what started out as a group of strangers, to now, true companions. Over the last few days, I’ve realized even more so the key way of loving yourself is to embrace yourself. During this journey of honesty and deep diving, we gained the essence of embracing ourselves as we are and allowing others to embrace each one as well.
When I embrace myself, I don’t fight against my weaknesses. It’s part of me.
I embrace by letting down all my guards and let go.
I embrace all the thoughts while meditating. They cycle in and out of me.
I embrace my fears as they turn into the fuel to thrive.
I embrace my past into who I am today.
I embrace myself by being completely honest, strip away the layers and be comfortable, being nude.
When I embrace myself, I let go of how I am portrayed or want to be portrayed and simply just…be.
That, is very freshing and relieving, as I realized that being is such a lovely way to be. And down to the core, it starts and ends there.
I know that ‘allowing others to embrace you fully and let them love you’ may not come easy for many people. Heck, sometimes it takes a lifetime for people to be here and it’s on-going throughout life. But I experienced my wonderful program classmates opened up and allowed the two-way, group-way embrace and it was the start and it was beautiful.
V’stars, I know you can too. Have you embraced yourself? Letting others embrace and love you? How does it feel?
This new episode of Vanae.com is a response to Qaadir on knowing your worth and putting your foot down when someone is not treating you right. Ladies and gents, never put up with someone’s bs in hopes that they will reciprocate or like you. If they recognize how great of a catch you are, they wouldn’t be treating you like that in the first place.
You are hot commodity. You have outstanding qualities. So save them for someone who deserves it.
V’stars, what do you think?
Vanae’s tip of the dae: If that person stood-you up even once, that’s where you draw the line. If the person wants to reschedule, be straight up and tell him that he needs to work for it to earn a hangout with you! Let them work for it. And when I say work for it, I mean, work FOR IT! Scheduling the next hangout, planning it from A-Z, confirm with you and go the whole nine yards. If anything less than that, Fuck ‘em. There’s too many other hot commodities out there, don’t waste your time with sub-par peeps.
