i’m going to dissneyland! hahaha!

very interesting concept

Introvert: Someone who “recharges their batteries” when doing something along. It is possible for someone to be very outgoing socially (a lot of actors are introverts) but still need time alone to collect themselves. Introverts do feel good when interacting with people, but it tiring and there is a limit on how much can be done in a day.

VS Extraverts: who get their energy from interacting with people. So at a party, they feel better, while if they are home alone they get bored and feel bad.

These two tend to be just how you are born, and the amount of cross-exposure doesn’t seem to change things very much. It definitely improves your endurance, but you still can’t go on all day every day.

Shy: Someone who feels timid, and is not very outgoing when meeting new people.

Social Anxiety: Someone who feel anxious around people, especially new people but often can be seen around their own friends to some extent in certain situations. . Demonstrated by fear, apprehension and discomfort in social situations. At some level, everyone feels this but there is also the psychological definition where it occurs nearly continuously in almost any kind of situation. Frequently, that the feeling associated with the “Do I look right? Did I say the right thing? What should I do?” thoughts.

Social Phobia: Where the Social Anxiety is so high, that the individual will go often go out of their way to avoid social situations. Either in certain situations (eating, dancing, young/older/same-age people, opposite-sex interactions, etc) or from society entirely. Although both Social Anxiety and Phobia are rooted in the “fight or flight” response, the phobia tends to be much more intense with patients emotionally feel that their life is in eminent danger (even though they logically know it is not – as opposed to paranoia, where they actually think they are).

To restate – It is possible for someone to be a introvert and not by shy. It is possible for someone to be shy, but not be afraid of social situations. It is normal to feel uncomfortable in /some/ social situations, but if it is regularly consistent then it could be a disorder.

If the fear is so much that it is limiting what you /want/ to do with your life, do not be afraid of going and getting professional help. Write down your feelings beforehand (a journal is especially helpful) if you are not comfortable with talking, and hand that over to the psychologist.

I do have to admit, that overall the only real solution is just to force oneself to increased exposure (going out more). There is medications that can help stabilize things emotionally, but they can’t eliminate them entirely, and you still have to go out there and do it (in a lot of small steps).

It helps to expose yourself to just a /little/ more then you are used to, and maintain that for a duration. For example, saying “good morning” to people you pass in the street, try small talk with the teller at the grocery store and asking simple questions to classmates/co-workers (“where is the bathroom? Did you get the new TPS report?). If you jump off the deep end right into the sharks [Like trying to talk to that super hot girl over there] it could be too intense and you can only manage to keep the conversation going for ~30 seconds before breaking down, which can leave you with a negative experience which can make the fear even stronger. If you are at a pretty good level already, then naturally you will want to raise the bar (or set it lower then this if you need to – think teeny tiny baby steps).

I am not a psychologist, I have just read quite a bit on the topic and from my own personal experience.

I have no problem talking to girls, but it is totally different when its a girl I really like. I believe it is because I tend to think too much when I’m around a girl I like(more self-conscious, and trying too hard).

Imma print your eight points and put it on my bathroom , so I read it as an advice every morning. :]

Here is some food for thought: http://www.genomenewsnetwork.org/articles/04_00/shyness.shtml

Well, originally from Detroit. Then moved to Los Angeles with my family when I was in junior high. Attended college and graduate school in Berkeley, and lived in the Bay Area for 7 years. Moved back to LA and taught high school for a number of years, and then changed careers to manage the retirement trust fund for the So. Cal. Kaiser Permanente physicians. Preceded by several years in the banking and financial planning business with Washington Mutual. That’s my career in a nutshell. How about you?

Based on the diversity and content of your website, I could almost see that being a full time career for you in the service of others. But since I suspect you have endless energy, creativity and imagination — I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that you also have another full time career to generate the income needed to make the first dream come true. Maybe we’ll have an opportunity to meet and visit in person one day soon. I have my bid in for the “date for charity” auction which ends tomorrow. I’m new to eBay, but I think I’m the current high bidder. Haven’t been to the Bay Area in awhile, so that would be a nice get away. If I win, we have to get some ice cream at the Ghirardelli location near Fisherman’s Wharf. What do you think?? That’s one of my old hang-outs. Less than a day to go to find out. Wish me luck… BRUCE

Accidentally came across some of your YouTube videos while surfing the web tonight. Great advice with a genuine concern for your friends and fans. All the while enjoying your fabulous smile, gorgeous eyes, and other features too numerous to mention. Put it all together and it makes for one fantastic web site. Now it time to learn more about the charity event, and see if there’s another “win a date” opportunity. I didn’t really need that 401(k) account anyway. Thanks for what you’re doing in reaching out to others and sharing important advice. The video on “health” will save some lives for those who do get tested. It doesn’t get more important than that. And you message was delivered with great love and concern.
–Bruce