8 Signs of an unhealthy relationship
We all been been-there-done-this! I know I went through one 4 years ago and came out of it stronger and here to share my experience. Unhealthy relationships are usually with the one we fell flat-on-our-face-for. So intense that you lose yourself! But you need to recognize the damage before becoming handicapped.
Signs that your relationship is unhealthy:
1. Your significant other is the only person you hang out with
2. You flake out on people & responsibilities to spend more time with your gf/bf
3. There’s abuse (mental, verbal, physical, emotional) from either sides
4. You have no support system besides him/her
5. Deep down, you feel like you’ve lost yourself
6. You’re constantly disappointed
7. There’s constant jealousy and no trust
8. He/she restricts you (hanging out with certain people, goals)
Get out of there as soon as possible, or you’ll build up so much resentment that you’ll explode! If you do, it’ll be too late to salvage a friendship.
Gain a healthy relationship through:
A. Balance
She/he can be an important part of your life, but not what your life is all about. You need to balance your time, priorities, wants, needs and self.
B. Communication
Don’t let things bottle up inside. Be sure to communicate effectively to improve your connection. If you there’s something bothering you, then tell her/him that.
C. Understanding
Take the time to listen and understand where she/he is coming from. This will help with patience and it’ll strengthen your bond. She/he will feel like they can open up to you.
D. Independence
A person who can hold their own (opinion, goals, thoughts, social life) shows independence. No one wants a super slingy person.
When did you realize it was an unhealthy relationship? How did you get out of it?
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yeah i have some of those point in my relationship right now so i better get to fix this thax
wow!!! that’s sooo true…. I’ve experienced all that before, and now reading back on it, I can kind of see where me and my ex went wrong. We went out for just under a year, but I realised she was the wrong person for me like 6 months in, but for some unknown reason, I held onto the relationship hoping that something would change. Never doing that again, or at least, not for that long anyways.
Funny thing is though, it’s been almost 2 years now since we broke up, and she won’t talk to me (not that i’ve been trying to), and still runs away from me if she happens to see me, so yeah, friendship over!!!!
I guess reading your post is food for thought for when I think of getting a gf again.
Hi there,
I just came out of this kind of relationship.
Actually, I am the first responsible for this situation. I mean, I moved to another country to be with my girlfriend, to live together… I mean, she was the only reason I moved… and thus, I didn’t see the point in meeting new people. First of all I was extremely jealous, second because I naturally fear and don’t trust people. Sartre said once “people are devil” and I totally agree. The more I am alone, the better I feel.
My now ex girlfriend was totally the opposite. In the need to meet a lot of people all the time… so for me it was terrible coz I really cannot trust people. Besides, she was not really helping me when I was in bad times.
Anyway, now everything is over now. But it’s very hard coz on one side I miss her a lot, but on the other side, It will be more destructive to get together again.
I can identify some of those points on mine…
not as easy to got out of it tho ad I am married to her… not that I want to… I do love her with defects or not…
I suppose that fixing things is a LOT more complicated than leaving them behind…
I find all of the points here made very true. I just got out of an 8 month relationship that was very toxic. The guy that I dated had a lot of family problems, which seemed to make him very needy and over dramatic (which I didn’t notice at first). There were little red flags that kept popping up, like a note during our first week of dating talking about how he loved me! It was going way too fast, but I waited it out, because I really did care about him…thinking that he liked me a lot but didn’t know how to communicate it in the ‘right’ way.
We had a lot of great moments, but I had a sinking feeling that I was losing myself. I didn’t have time to do anything that I wanted to do anymore because I spent a lot of time with him. I would try to get my space and he would try to give me patience, but it was obvious he was upset.
The break-up was really hard, because it ended in a way that didn’t give much closure at all. We have a lot in common and were really good friends before we dated, but after all of the fights and resentment, I don’t even know if our friendship is reconcilable. I’m still trying to get to the confident, indepednent “me” that I was before I dated him, but it’s harder that I thought.
So if something doesn’t feel right, sometimes it really is best to just leave
I wish I left sooner so I would still have a friend.